http://ask.metafilter.com/74397/Can-you-sustain-a-strong-marital-relationship-after-having-a-child
has some of the best stuff that I've ever seen on to what degree and how, that is or can be done. Sure, many of the posts contradict each other, but I think if you look through you'll see at least three that I nodded ALL THE WAY THROUGH, and they're not all just pure snark and negativity (although they are high on the latter regarding the post-child relationship, which is of course also my own experience, thence the nod).
Pregnancy began? September 2008.
Relationship? Still out on the horizon. March 2011.
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